What is reimagining fluidity? Do you believe that fluidity is way beyond sex and gender? In this episode of Reclamation, The Reclas: Tonya, Justin, and Neva talk about fluidity to allow us to reimagine ourselves and shatter the boxes and limitations we build around us to separate us from other people. The Reclas also tackle the long list of identities an individual has or the chameleon ability. Tune in to this episode with Tonya, Justin, and Neva to discuss fluidity, confidence, and finding your true self.
Neva Lee Recla:
Hello everyone. This is Neva Lee Recla and you are listening to the Reclamation show. I’m here with my parents.
Tonya Dawn Recla:
Tonya Dawn Recla.
Justin Recla:
Justin.
Tonya Dawn Recla:
And today we are going to be talking all about re-imagining fluidity. I am so excited about this topic y’all. This is something we talk about a lot in our house. And how do you reimagine it? How do you define it? Can you even define fluidity? Because it’s like water. You can’t put water in a cardboard box. It’ll only leak out. We should try that sometime. It’s a science experiment. But there are so many different ways someone could define it. And it’s different for everybody.
Everybody has different opinions about what it is. In my opinion, it’s more than sexuality. It’s more than gender. It’s everything. We’re talking about going with the flow. We did that at the burning man a lot if you have to go with the flow. You may think you’re going somewhere, but then you go the exact opposite direction. And if you’re so attached to the direction that you go, you’re not going to be able to have fun when you end up going somewhere else. And I think that’s what life is, is releasing all attachments and just being in the flow and just sitting in that. I’m going to quote mom, “being in that yummy space.”
You can share that word too. It can be your word too. I’ll share it with you.
Justin Recla:
Yummy.
Neva Lee Recla:
There are so many different ways we can define it. We’re going to talk about how do you define it as a family and how do you have these conversations? These aren’t new topics folks. But they are being re-imagined in so many new, different ways, especially with my generation, Gen Z. We’re getting some real awareness and opinions about things and our parents are going to be our biggest role models. Let’s get into how to have those conversations. Mom, I’m going to pass it onto you because I know you’re kind of an expert in the topic of fluidity and inequality. In your words, how would you sum up fluidity and how would you, I guess, define it in the broad spectrum that it is?
Tonya Dawn Recla:
That’s a huge mouthful because there’s dimensionality with this. There are layers. There’s the progression that we’ve seen. And so from the broadest stroke that I can see, what I’m witnessing at the levels at which I vision out is that the fluidity of conversation is starting to allow us to, one, re-imagine ourselves, which is crucial, allow others to re-imagine themselves. And also, it’s showing us the extreme complexity that is the Godhead. That is the divine. When we want to put anything in a box, whether it’s ourselves, about gender, sexuality, abilities, all of the social identities that we like to claim.
Justin Recla:
I’m a football fan.
Tonya Dawn Recla:
Right. A football fan or I don’t like football. That’s its own identity. Or I do social media, I don’t do social media, right? We develop those personalities and stuff and we create those identities for ourselves. And what happens is, it limits our ability to listen to spirit. It limits our willingness to change, to pivot. Part of the reason for our success is that we were willing to be fluid. We were willing to let ourselves be moved and shaped and molded in alignment with what the divine was guiding us into. And you can not do that if you put yourself in a box. And hear me, folks, like I am the biggest advocate for making sure that we are being inclusionary, making sure that we understand the ramifications of perpetuating systems of oppression. This is nothing new for me and we can talk about that more. But beyond that conversation we have to start asking ourselves, what are we fighting for? Why are we fighting each other? But what are we wanting? What is the world that we want to live in?
This is why we’re budding up against these things. Why are we breaking these systems down? Do we even know what the goal is? And when those of us are able to envision that far, it is extremely fluid because the divine is extremely fluid and nothing is outside of its reach when it comes to developing you. And so those of you who are really working through matters of sexuality, matters of gender identity, matters of all of it.
Justin Recla:
Politics.
Tonya Dawn Recla:
Politics. I mean I can’t even name all the boxes and things that we start to create around ourselves so that we can kind of separate ourselves from other people. There are real reasons for that. We can go into the whole psychology of it and why we want to know. I want to know what your race is.
I want to know what your gender is. It helps me feel more secure in the world. I want to be able to put you in a box so that I know how to deal with you. And that’s really what this is all pushing back against. Don’t tell me you know who I am simply because you think you know a label I have. Now the flip side of that is we have to be willing to then let go of the identities that we so staunchly want to hold on to, to say, wait, but this makes me special. There is a flip of this coin folks that we have to start looking at.
Neva Lee Recla:
Exactly. I love all the points that you covered there. This is part of the reason I love talking with you about these things because you’ve taught me a lot about this. I know there’s so much more to learn and with the topic of fluidity, you can’t have attachments because it’s never going to work. It’s like trying to shove a full human into a small box. It’s never going to work. You have to release the attachment.
Dad, before we get into the break, I’m going to pass it onto you, especially with chameleon ability. We talk about this a lot, especially you and me. There are so many different identities that are built-in chameleon ability. It can be around the smallest things, whether getting upset around something. But an entire identity gets created around just one thing. In our previous episode that we were just talking about, we were talking all about the personality onion is basically what it is. Dad, how does your personality get involved with the topic of fluidity?
Justin Recla:
Well, for me, it’s been a journey. It’s releasing the, I am. It reminds me of a meme that’s been going around social media where you can’t hear what God has to say if you think you already know what he’s telling you.
Neva Lee Recla:
It’s like putting on noise-canceling headphones and expecting to hear it.
Justin Recla:
Yeah, you can’t. And so in the “I am this,” the “I am that,” especially with the chameleon ability of, well, that’s just the way I am. Right? That’s the way I do things. That’s the way I am. You’re limiting yourself. It doesn’t leave room for change. And it actually is, it becomes an excuse that creates a hell loop, right? That for something that we say that we don’t want, we don’t want to identify as, and it could be good, bad, or otherwise, but it comes down to that not only self-awareness but the confidence piece and knowing that no matter what situation I find myself in, I’m going to be able to handle it.
Why? Because that’s what God tells me. I am who he says I am. And for me, letting go of all those pieces, letting go of all those identities, letting go of any of them, I am this, or I am that or buying into what other people said I am. It’s been a lifetime journey, right? And it got accelerated when I married your mom. I’m grateful for that every day because, in our relationship, she helped break down all of those because she saw me in my divineness, at my highest. I wanted to believe that more than any other box or construct that I had created for myself and not to say that they don’t blip back up, not to say that they don’t show back up. And it just layers.
The farther you go in alignment with the, I am that God, the divine, the universe says you are the smaller and smaller those little stories become, which makes it a lot easier to stay out of them. And it makes it a lot more fun to navigate life because I’m not limited. When you can identify as the divine in yourself and who God sees you be, you get to experience life however you’re meant to.
But if I hold on to it, I’m a football fan. I’m a Cardinals fan. I’m a Republican. I’m this. It automatically creates separation, divisiveness. It makes other people wrong. And it pairs us against one another at the smallest of levels. One of the biggest areas we’re seeing is in politics, right? Cause we all want the same thing, but because nobody can get beyond their ego in the, I am, making everybody wrong. Here we are, sitting where we’re at today. For me, re-imagining fluidity is just that. It’s letting go of the, I am. And recognizing that who you are is bigger than you think you are. If you can’t see it for yourself, if you’re not talking to God, find somebody who is so they can remind you of who you are. So you can let go of that and be more fluid in your life.
Neva Lee Recla:
I love that advice because letting go of attachments, letting go of them, gives you so much freedom. There’s no room for growth in a box. You can’t do that. It’s like growing plants. They have to move out of their pot at some point. And trying to keep it there will work well, it’ll just lead to a sad, depressed plant. Don’t make yourself a sad, depressed plant. And we are going to take a quick break. Thank you both for having this conversation with me. Thank you all for chiming in and listening to this. We have been talking all about re-imagining fluidity and if you want to have these types of conversations with us more and play with us in the awesome Superpower Space that we are in go to superpowerexperts.com and join the Superpower Universe today. Right after you watch this episode. We’ll be right back after the break.
To listen to the entire show click on the player above or go to the SuperPower Up! podcast on iTunes.
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