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Deep Throat: Exposing rape culture from the inside out

Have you ever wondered why we can whip out phrases like “cancel culture” “divisive culture,” even “rape culture,” and debate deconstructed solutions, but never once stop and ask two crucial, foundational questions. Question number one: Is this true? As in, is this an accurate description of our culture? Which inevitably leads us to realize no one really knows since someone(s), somewhere(s) simply made up the phrases and we all went along then found evidence to prove them. So we follow up with the second, more imperative question. Question number two: Do we want this to be true?

As an aside, once you internalize the whole concept that we create the reality we experience, you can skip to the second part and save yourself some time.

But, regardless of how you get there, arriving at the awareness that we wield creative control in all things and get to choose where we focus our intent and energy is a natural and necessary developmental notch in the belt. And sets the stage for all of us taking full responsibility for this cluster of a reality we created together. So we can, possibly, make different choices moving forward and, perhaps, walk together toward a different tomorrow.

But, before we get prematurely excited, let’s not forget why we’re here. We’ve had a lie shoved down our throats for awhile now. If we want to get technical, we’ve been swallowing this lie for, well…what’s the oldest profession and when did it start?

See what I mean…

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Just the tip

This is no simple matter and, as with most things pandemic-powered, refuses to remain a dirty little secret lurking in the shadows any longer. Undeniably, the sheets have been torn back and the bloodied mess is lying there for all to see. If we want true change, we can’t pretend to be satisfied with just the tip of…well, anything. But certainly not a conversation that indoctrinates and imprisons all of us. And believing that this current sleight of hand, victim-idolization motif is designed for our empowerment doesn’t just make us complicit, it confirms all of us are incapable of much more than rolling over and taking it, faking it, making it, it doesn’t really matter, it all results in the same thing. At the heart of this is a society of people who continue to choose to believe the worst about each other and then set about proving themselves right.

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And that’s truly just the tip. Beneath this apparently insurmountable divide is the very epicenter of everything wrong with the world. Sound far-fetched? Perhaps, but I challenge the contrary. It’s no great leap in logic to state that the very suggestion of rape culture means we believe, on a deep creative and conceptual level, that it’s possible. In fact, the moment we needed a phrase to explain it, we agreed it was inevitable. To this, most point to the unquestionable proof that rape does, in fact, exist and to pretend otherwise is paramount to bypassing.

But before we assume that it’s a simple either/or situation, what if we propose a both/and? It is possible that rape exists and it is possible that it doesn’t have to. Despite all shouts and proclamations to end rape culture, I’m not sure how many people actually believe that’s possible. What would the world look like if rape wasn’t acculturated? In order to conceive of such a world, we must first be willing to see all the ways this one construct penetrates the depth of our identities and plunders the deep wound that tears us apart