Celebrating the Transition to Parenthood

Why should people start celebrating the transition to parenthood significantly? In this episode of Superpower Mommas, host Tatiana Berindei sits with guest Christine Devlin Eck. They talk about simple and profound ways to mark the transition into parenthood. The adjustment stage is common to all new parents; thus, Christine shares some processes of creating new rituals and cycles. Tune in as this episode pave the way to celebrating the transition to parenthood

Tatiana Berindei:

Hello everyone, and welcome to the Superpower Mommas podcast show. I’m your host, Tatiana Berindei, and I’m really delighted to welcome Christine Devlin Eck back to the show for our final episode in our series on the postpartum experience. Today we’re going to be talking about celebrating the transition to parenthood and how that can be a healing experience. If you have not yet listened to some of our other episodes, go back and find them. There’s some really beautiful and potent information that’s come through. But I’m just really delighted to welcome Christine back to the show again today.

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Christine Devlin Eck:

Thank you so much for having me. These have been amazing.

Tatiana Berindei:

Agreed. So let’s discuss. Let’s dive in. Before we cut to break we can open up the doorway a little bit and peer into it. Why is celebrating this transition important? And maybe also because I feel like there’s a lot out of celebration around becoming new parents. That’s kind of culturally that you have your baby shower, people have gotten really creative with all of these gender reveals and all the things, there’s this real excitement in the leading up to, and then it’s kind of like, “All right, you’ve had your baby. Great.” Then it can be kind of jarring, that moment.

Christine Devlin Eck:

Yeah. I definitely feel that celebration in all of the moments of that childbearing near is so valuable. I think when we feel celebrated during pregnancy when we’re anticipating the birth of this baby, we feel held, we feel seen, we feel excited, we feel nourished. There’s sort of that abundance that comes with people looking forward to the birth. And you’re right, there’s not the same amount of acknowledgment or celebration, it feels like, for the magnitude of the transition that the birthing person has experienced. Yes, we’re so excited to meet the baby and we’re really trying to take in the beauty of new life, but there’s something else that really is important for being able to feel like a healthy, balanced being and person on all the different levels when society when families when communities really celebrate and acknowledge the birth giver’s transition into parenthood. And that’s what I’m really thinking about in this conversation.

Tatiana Berindei:

And one of the things that really struck me when I had my first child was like that, what you were just talking about. How being celebrated when pregnant was like, “Oh my God, I’m in this magical space. I’m a goddess. I can do anything. I’m this amazing birthing person and I’m so excited to walk into this transition. I’m going to become a mom. I’ve wanted to be a mom my whole life.” And then I had a really traumatic experience and gained a ton of weight and blah, blah, blah. There were a lot of things that were unexpected in that journey.

But what was most alarming to me and I think unexpected was how I became like nothing after the baby was born. I would go out into the world and people sometimes wouldn’t even look at me or make eye contact with me. It was all about the baby. And I think there’s this invisibility thing that happens for new moms sometimes. It’s just a really intense transition that, to go from being celebrated because you’re one with this being to then it’s just everything’s about the baby.

Christine Devlin Eck:

It’s very real. And whether or not people take the moment to really look at it, like I just listened to you look at your experience and contrast the difference between your pregnancy and how you felt perceived afterward that happens a lot. And I think it’s really important to be able to say that is happening for people and it’s creating an imbalance in how strong and vibrant people actually perceive themselves to be. Because I think in general because we’re having these conversations, we know and I think listeners also feel that there’s a lot that needs to happen for postpartum people. But what I really, really am excited about exploring is how we are taking care of health and wellness on all of the different levels. Okay, there’s physical, a postpartum person they go to the doctor, they get their six-week checkout, “You’re okay to work out,” or whatever. But there are also the emotional and spiritual and mental levels that are just as important.

And yeah, in our culture, we have a big place to work on in terms of mental health. And I think people really know that. But what I am so fascinated by, and I know that I’m speaking to someone who feels the same, is that there’s this transformational perception of our own health and wellness when we feel cared for, when we feel mothered, when we feel that the people around us can see how magnificent and astronomical this transition just was. For someone who just pushed a baby out of their body, it’s likely the most tremendous thing they have ever done. And if we look at the systemic structure that’s there holding us now, I don’t see any spaces where that is really described as such. We have to kind of go out into finding the support groups who really can acknowledge that mystical type of piece for it. But without that connection to being acknowledged in that extraordinary way, I believe that there are repercussions that we feel on an emotional, spiritual, mental and even physical level.

Tatiana Berindei:

Yeah. So we’re going to talk about ways to bring this celebration in a really healthy way, ways that we can support new moms, ways that we can support ourselves. Because what I’m hearing as you were just talking, it’s like. Well, maybe it’s not unfortunate. There is something to, I think if we want to change a culture, there are some moms that are going to just have to initiate that. We’re going to have to initiate that for ourselves. We’re going to have to claim that space and say, “I deserve to have this. And I am welcoming it, and I’m inviting it, and I’m encouraging it and I’m asking for it in this transition.”

I think it’s going to really take moms stepping up and asking for that. Not just do I think a lot of times women have this tendency, I know that I see this in relationship dynamics all the time, where we just want people to do things for us. We want, especially our partners, to just read our minds and know what we want them to do and then do it. And this doesn’t feel different to me. I think that we are going to need to advocate for ourselves a little bit if we really do want to create this change culturally. And we’re going to have to advocate for each other. So we’re going to talk a little bit more, a lot more, when we come back from break about fun and encouraging and exciting ways to really bring that celebration in. When we get back from break. Before we go to break, Christine, will you tell our listeners where they can go to find out more about you and your work?

Christine Devlin Eck:

Yeah. Thank you so much. You can find more information about myself, at the Center for Sacred Window Studies at sacredwindowstudies.com.

Tatiana Berindei:

Awesome. And if you have not come and checked us out in the Superpower Universe, come and play with us over there. There’s a lot of really yummy stuff happening. I’m doing the new moon virtual circles right now, which is just a really fun and nice way to drop into the cycles and the rhythms of the moon and the earth and your dreams every month. That’s happening through the Superpower Universe. We’ve got some great classes in there and some great deals and discounts for members. So come and check us out. You can go to superpowermommas.com, and sign up for your free seven-day trial over there. So right now we are talking with Christine Devlin Eck about celebrating the transition to parenthood, and we’ve got some yummy stuff to talk about when we get back. So stay tuned, we’ll be right back.

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