Jenn Mayers, coach, speaker, and self-professed “traveling homebody,” joins Kristin Maxwell to explore how you can be confident and become the most confident person you know. A powerhouse who started a successful coaching and copywriting business at 25, only to walk away from it at 30 to follow her passion for helping others develop their power and influence, Jenn shares the qualities and beliefs that allowed her to develop a solid confidence in herself and her abilities. Listen in as Jenn explains how the mantra “everything is figure-outable” can help you become your most confident self!
Hey everyone. This is Kristen Maxwell, and you are listening to Your SuperPowered Mind.
In this podcast, we talk to guests and deconstruct the process of their own transformation so that you can learn how to transform your own life.
Our guest today is amazing, I cannot wait to have you listen to her advice and her wisdom. With Jenn Mayers, and Jenn is a coach. She’s a speaker and a power house. She built a successful marketing business, code, for those in the personal development business, all before the age of 25.
She’s now doing something crazy, following her passion, and now helps other people become their most powerful selves so that they can make the best and boldest contribution in the world.
So Jenn, thank you for joining me here today.
You’re so welcome Kristin, thank you for inviting me, I’m excited to be here and to hang out with you today and your listeners.
Thank you. I’m sorry it was a little bit discombobulated, I’m just gonna put it out there, I realized that I have somebody doing construction next door and I was a little distracted. But hopefully I did you justice.
Sounded good to me, yeah.
So the first question I always have with my guests is, what superpower did you uncover as a result of mastering your mind?
That’s such a good question. To me it’s not a matter of uncovering one superpower, it’s once you master your mind, you can uncover as many superpowers as you want. You’re more likely to find out that you’re capable of most anything that you set your mind to, now that your mind isn’t in the way.
But if I had to pick one, because I think you’re looking for just one, if I had to pick one it would be just seeing how infinitely creative I am, and how other people notice me differently. They see me as a very confident person even when I don’t feel confident. They see me as a very peaceful person, even if inside I’m working on something. They see me as nearly unstoppable, even when I’m up against challenges. So I find it really interesting that when I’m in my creativity, I’ve unlocked that creativity and expressing it in a way to reach goals, it looks pretty cool.
That is pretty cool. And I have to tell the listeners that I do know you outside of this and you are really a force. You have a power and a presence that really is very unusual, especially for somebody who is so young, not that we’re supposed to talk about age or anything. But you really do have a presence, which is amazing.
How did you discover this creativity, how did it come up?
Well, I think when I was a kid, I didn’t discover it, I was just it. I think as kids we just naturally are creative, we’re not questioning our creativity, we go, “I want to be on the swing set, I’m gonna go on the swing set, I’m gonna swing.” We swing five times and we’re done, and we get off.
We’re not questioning, “Should I get on the swing set? What about those other kids, what are they gonna think about me if I get on the swing set?”
No, we just do something we want to. And the moment we’re complete with it, we get off and we go on to the next project. We’re just naturally a creative force in our own lives, creating the life that we want.
What it feels like for me is a journey of, that was me as a kid, and then I became a teenager and a college student, and it got covered up with all sorts of conditioning and insecurities, things like that. So I really find that it’s a relearning or uncovering and awakening of my natural creative self, who I’ve always been, just couldn’t see it for a while.
Right. That’s a beautiful description of what happens to us as we get older. So the million dollar question, then, is how did you then figure out how to remove those conditioning and insecurities?
I realize it’s not a simple question. I know you can’t give a simple answer.
I’m gonna do my best to give a simple answer, because simple is genius. We really can make it simple, it’s executing it that is typically the challenge. But the simple answer is, I went within. It was an opportunity for self-discovery and self-inquiry. If something didn’t go my way, I wouldn’t look to the outside for the responsibility, I would go within and say, “Okay, I don’t think I deserved that person being that upset with me, but how was I showing up in a way that was attracting that?”
And doing that with projects as well. Okay, so the project didn’t launch quite the way we wanted, so what responsibility can I take here, what are the actions I absolutely can control in my own way, and that my team can control, and then we can move forward.
Did I answer your question?
Yes, you did. I love that. You’re speaking to this ability and recognition that you have this ability to actually control how you respond. And that might be the only thing that you can control.
In my short experience, because I’m young’, I’m just the 3-0 so far, for now. But in my experience, that really is the only thing we can control, is how we show up in the world and the things that we decide to look at within ourselves. Sometimes we decide, you know, I’ve got this button and I don’t feel like looking at it right now. And that’s a choice and that’s okay.
But it’s a privilege to have that kind of control and that kind of choice, and it doesn’t happen on the outside with the things going on around us, that’s what happens on the inside.
Right. That leads perfectly to my next question, which you started to answer, is that sometimes, and I know I’m guilty of this. I go inward, but only as a way to beat myself up. What I did wrong.
How did you either learn not to do that, or how do you stop yourself if you start going
down that path?
I definitely still do that sometimes. I look forward to the day where that is not part of my chemical makeup or something I’m working through. But there are still days where I notice the voice in my head is really being quite an a-hole.
There’s a couple components here. One is realizing that that voice that’s beating me up isn’t me. When I can make that voice also outside of me and go, oh, that’s just like John, who cursed me out, not me. That voice is not me.
That helps. So then we can have compassion for that voice. Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry you feel that way. And depending on where you are, if you’re in the middle of- sometimes you’re in the middle of a meeting and you can’t go right into healing whatever’s come up and being present with it. You can say, “Thank you for bringing this to my attention, I’m so sorry you’re feeling that way, I will come back to you later today.”
And you’re giving that hurt part of you, even though it’s not you but it’s you, that hurt part the acknowledgement it’s looking for, and then an opportunity to get to say what it needs to say or express what it needs to express, at a time that works best for you. So you’re setting boundaries with yourself.
And the other part is, when you do get to sit down with yourself and hear it out, it’s having that neutral compassion. And I went through this phase in my life about three years ago, I was going through a whole bunch of stuff where I left a five-year relationship, I donated 80 percent of my belongings and I lived out of a carry-on suitcase and travelled around the US and Europe for about a year and a half- actually, 10 months.
I made it a conscious decision to be relentlessly gentle with myself. And it was not always that easy. I was like, wow. I’m having to really try hard to be nice to myself. And that was eye-opening, realizing how hard it was to be kind to myself. It was easy to be kind to other people. Sometimes easier. But not to myself. And I just thought, oh my gosh. I’m doing this at the right time, because if it’s this hard to be kind to myself, what else am i missing out on?
So even though I was traveling around the world and experiencing all sorts of incredible things, to me the best part was that every day my number one focus was on that kindness to myself, and then sharing that with other people. And things melted away. I felt like I was melting every day and things didn’t really bother me as much anymore, so that was pretty cool.
That’s truly amazing. There is so much goodness in what you just said, so many learnings that I’ve learned later than you, let me just say that.
Yeah, but you learned them, that’s great.
I did. Well, I’m still learning them. But I love this. I’d like to go deeper into this. But right now we have to take a break. Can you let everybody know where they can learn more about you?
Yeah. It’s super easy, you can go to my website at jennmayers.com. We’ve got awesome blog posts and some of my love letters. Like I was saying, when I was being relentlessly kind to myself, I wrote a ton of love letters to myself and the universe, and a lot of people find them to be valuable. And then of course, updates happening all the time.
So my website, jennmayers.com.
That’s great. Thank you Jenn. We’re gonna take a brief break, and then we’re gonna come back and talk more about how to be the most confident person you know.