Rosie and Sunny Aiello, inspirational mother and daughter, join Neva Lee Recla to share their insight on how to gain confidence by loving yourself. Trapped in an emotionally, mentally and financially abusive relationship for nearly 25 years, Rosie engineered an international escape from the Middle East to save her daughter and herself from domestic violence. Now they inspire women to love themselves and find their voices. Listen in to learn how to gain confidence and find your voice.

Thank you for coming on my show.

Thank you for having us.

Absolutely, for having us. Yeah.

I’m so exited. So what are your guys’ superpowers?

Go ahead, you go first.

I have the gift of knowing things before they happen through my feelings.

Mine is my intuition. I’m very intuitive. And I also have the gift of knowing things before they happen through my feelings so that’s my superpower.

That’s cool.

Yeah. And so my superpowers are compassionate listening and helping people move forward, taking that next step in their lives.

That’s cool, those are good superpowers to have.

Thank you. What’s yours?

Well kind of like Sunny I can feel into the situation and see if I feel like it’s gonna happen or not. I can talk different to people, like feel into the energy kind of and see how I need to communicate. Yeah those are some of mine.

That’s pretty cool.

Love that.

Thank you. So you guys have a very inspiring story and it’s just so amazing. So can you share with me and our listeners, what did you both learn from that? And how are you using that to inspire people?

Yeah, you know that’s a really great question Neva.

Thank you.

And I think the thing that I can say that I learned from it, and this is what our company is based on is that I deserve to be treated with kindness. And that’s what we want to teach everybody else. That they deserve to be treated with kindness. You deserve it. And part of that, I know we’re gonna get into is that you deserve to be treated with kindness and it starts with treating yourself with kindness.

Yeah.

Yeah and you know, children also deserve to know that they deserve to be treated with respect and kindness and just because you’re a kid doesn’t mean you don’t have any rights.

Exactly.

So we really wanna instill that in children that they have a voice, as you know with your feelings how important they are for you and you’re very in tune with them, our feelings will help save us from situations that could be scary and so they’re all equipped, we just want them to know that and they have what it takes.

That’s awesome. And I think that’s so important for anyone to learn because-

Absolutely.

Especially me, I know. I take my rights and my boundaries very seriously and if anyone were to overthrow that of my friends, my family, myself, it’s very important to me to keep that grounds.

Yeah. And I would think, ’cause I know your parents and you’re very, very blessed. And I would say most children your age don’t even know what the word boundary even means.

Yeah. Or that they even have the right to have boundaries because they’re kids.

Right. So for me a boundary is really just in simple terms, is letting people know how you wanna be treated.

Yeah.

How you wanna be spoken to and if people say a word that’s not nice, it’s like, well, I don’t wanna hear that word. I don’t want those words spoken to me. Or I don’t wanna be touched that way. And so that’s what self love is. That’s what self kindness is. It’s like saying, sometimes saying “No, I don’t want that” or “No, it doesn’t feel good” and to be able to like you do so well is to express your feelings. Like when you’re happy, that’s really obvious but like when you’re sad or maybe you’re angry sometimes right? Some things will make you angry and all those feelings are good and they’re right and they’re normal.

Exactly. I think it’s so important to tell people what matters to you and tell them if they’re overstepping your grounds and I think that’s really important for kids and adults to learn.

Absolutely.

Yes and children have, are still learning the vocabulary, they’re learning what does it mean, what is right and what isn’t right. And so there’s lots of things going on around them in the media and cartoons even and everything else, and I think what’s important is that they should, part of being treated with kindness means no one should ever say you’re stupid. You don’t know what you’re talking about. “You’re just a kid.” “You’re dumb.” All these words that put you down. It’s like, “No, that’s not right.” No matter who says it, whether it’s your parents, your relatives, your friends, your siblings, your teachers, your ministers.

Your life matters, your feelings matter.

And people are people. But you as a child again, and sometimes you think “Oh my gosh! But they’re bigger than me. Who am I?” And we wanna just tell your listeners, “Your audiences that you know what, you do matter. Your life matters, your feelings matter. Your thoughts matter.” How you feel inside your body is important. You know those feelings like when something doesn’t feel right. Do you feel like a little funny feeling in your stomach or something? If you are not happy, just leave.

I like tense up.

Yeah.

Kind of a just pull back.

Right, yeah. And so the children should be aware of that. It’s like when you feel that, that’s your body is talking to you. It’s like something’s wrong and maybe you may not know the words for it, that’s okay. But to know that it’s protecting you.

Yep. The self awareness piece and seeing what’s around you and seeing how other people are acting and how you need to act or step up.

That’s right.

And as you know, you guys are as kids, you’re already are very perceptive and aware of things that adults may not even be aware of, how aware and attentive you are to what’s going on. And even if you may not have the vocabulary for it, that doesn’t mean you don’t know what’s going on ’cause like we were saying you feel it and you’re seeing it. And you deserve to live in a safe environment, like you get to have with your parents. Which is extremely fortunate and all kids deserve to have that too.

I agree. I think it’s so important that everyone knows that, like something I’ve learned is treat people how you wanna be treated. So if you want people to treat you with respect and kindness and love, you have to give that to them instead of just expecting it from them.

And yeah this is a good statement, and I think everybody, not just children but adults need to know and even what does that really mean? ‘Cause if they haven’t had good examples growing up or around them, they’re gonna only be able to express what they know. And this is why this show of yours is so important to help these children start to have that awareness. Like we were saying earlier it’s like, yeah when somebody shouts at you and tells you you’re stupid and they say but I love you, it’s like no. That’s not right.

That’s not real love.

That’s not right. And we want the children to start to understand that, so if they’re ever in that predicament, to be able to go to somebody and talk to an adult that they can trust and who can listen to them and who supports them. This is what’s really important, wherever it is.

And validate their feelings.

Yes.

Which is very important, especially if that person who’s saying those things to you and treating you that way is a parent or family member or some authority figure, it can be more confusing for you as a kid. And finding that trusted adult who will help you get through it is so key.

Yeah. Trust your feelings.

And so we can actually talk little bit more about this but we have to take a quick break, really fast can you tell our listeners where they can go to find out more about you?

Yes. They can go to our website called theloveiskindnetwork.com.

Awesome. And definitely go check them out ’cause they’re just so inspirational and we’ll be right back.

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