Personal Coaching Step One – Manage Your Mind

The first step in personal coaching is to manage your mind. Your mind is a magnificent, wonderful, reliable, functional, purposeful, dependable, piece of you. It is NOT you. It is a tool — a database of perceptions, thoughts, fears, programs, memories, etc. designed to keep you alive. And it isn’t real interested in fast, massive, evolutionary changes.

But here’s the catch, your mind constantly sends you information to navigate this dangerous, treacherous, worrisome world we live in. It believes you need all of this information in order to survive. And it isn’t completely wrong. However it only knows one part of the story…the past part. Your mind is only helpful when it comes to recalling information about where you’ve been, the world you’re already familiar with, the place most of us strive to move beyond. The mind cannot help guide you where you’re going.

Now, keep in mind, I’m speaking purely evolutionarily right now. For those of you who are content doing what you’re doing and staying where you’re at, this information probably feels confusing (actually, I’m not really sure why/how you’re reading this article at all). I’m writing for those who change vibrational levels like they change their socks. You know who you are. You’re the ones who’ve read all the right human potential stuff and listened to all the right spiritual growth gurus and still scratch your heads asking, “NOW What?” Yep, I’m talking to you.

By now you’ve probably figured out that there’s a big disconnect between your higher self knowing how the world really works versus your human self acting accordingly. Some of this is attributed to that pesky mind. You see, most of us abdicated control to our minds decades ago. We’re taught to think in school and encouraged to absorb and recall programming through parents/family, social groups, religious organizations, and media, social and otherwise.

But the brain really isn’t designed to control anything, it lacks the architecture for it. It’s like our dog. We have a little 7 lb. toy schnauzer. We rescued her about a year ago. When we got her she had PTSD. I’d never experienced a dog that was convinced she had to be the alpha, but had absolutely no skills to play that role. Once she settled into the knowingness that she no longer had to be in charge, she relaxed, stopped shaking uncontrollably, and looked to us for guidance. Your mind can be managed the same way.

So let’s all become our own brain-whisperers. Ultimately you’re not going to stop your brain from thinking. With the exception of those of you on the pure enlightenment path (read: those who plan to ascend as full-fledged masters) most of us like for our brains to kick in now and then. The key is to let your mind do what your mind wants to do, but not allow it to run the show. Sounds good, right? But how do you do it?!?

It’s pretty simple, really. The issue is most of us don’t realize we’re separate from our brains. It’s the voice we’ve listened to for so long that we get confused. But your mind is best viewed as a young child. In fact, it’s one of three young children you have following you around: the mind, the emotional system, and the body. We’ll get to later. For now, recognize your brain is designed to keep you alive and it takes that job very seriously. To do this, it constantly reminds you of every minute thing that can go wrong. It brings up stories (yours and those of others) to remind you of all the things that have gone wrong in the past, in past lives, in someone else’s life, anywhere it can find any proof to make its case that what you’re moving toward may, in fact, kill you. And it creates compelling evidence that staying exactly where you are is the only surefire way to stay alive.

So, here we go — the easy steps everyone wants to placate the mind: (this works with your cognitive-driven children, also)

1. Don’t Show Fear — the second you give in to the fear your mind attempts to conjure, you’re done. The mind feeds on the fear and goes in for the kill. Stay calm and connected to your knowingness.

2. Question Everything — how does your mind know that if you pack up everything and take the job in Tahiti that you’ll die? How does your mind know that if you dye your hair blue you’ll never get a good job, you’ll never make any money, you’ll never be able to support yourself, and…you’ll die? How does your mind know that if you do anything against the norms of society surely, without fail, you’ll die?

3. Channel Your Inner Socrates — once you start questioning everything, ask your mind. Really. Have a conversation with your mind. Ask it how it knows this information. Ask it whose story it’s telling. Ask it what happens if you no longer choose to carry that story. Ask it. You might be surprised what happens when you start questioning your brain from a place of calm, collected, knowingness.

4. Thank Your Mind — your mind loves you and it really wants to keep you alive. It tries really hard to give you valuable information that keeps you from moving too quickly into scary, unknown terrain. Take a moment to acknowledge the information it gives you and thank it for all its hard work. Let it know that you have things under control and you’ll consult it when necessary. And make a commitment to stay in better communication so it doesn’t have to jump up and down or scream and shout to get your attention.

That’s it. It truly is that simple. You already know on a deep, intrinsic level that when you have dominion over your life, everything else falls in line. This just brings to the conscious level a technique to start realizing that knowingness. Stay tuned for the next episode about The Mind’s moody sibling The Emotional System. Until then…