Welcome to Incorporating SuperPowers. Thank you for continuing to listen. We are honored to have you here as part of the show as a listener. We value your loyalty, and we know you’re listening as 2020 wasn’t an amazing year. Thank you for continuing to listen.
For those that have been on and been following for a while, you’re going to notice a quick shift in the show. Last year was focused on a lot of the mechanics of what people were doing divergently in the business space. And now, we’re going to look at things from the perspective of that internal landscape. But what does that mean, and how do you get there as a person? And how are the people that are on the show living and being what they’re selling? Right? That’s what business is all about. And how can we use that to leverage each other’s experiences to better our own position and our own impact in the world?
My guest today is Jothi Dugar. You know, Tonya and I are coming from the counterintelligence world, the defense contractor world. Well, Jothi’s right there as well, as she has been in the government sector from a very young age starting with internships into high school. And now she’s one of the top cybersecurity leaders out there doing some really good work in the world.
But ironically in the mix of all of this, it’s not just that she’s in the governance sector. We share that space. But she’s also in that divergent-convergent space of doing things differently. She calls herself the chaos guru, and I can tell you and affirm for you that if you’ve ever been in the government, it’s a great place to get your practice in chaos. Today, we’re going to be talking about the love of chaos. Because chaos is an energy that can come in and impact our lives in so many different ways. Unless you understand what it is, how it works, and how it’s showing up for you, and your life, and your existence, it can wreak havoc. Jothi, thanks so much for being on the show today.
Thank you so much for having me. That’s a great introduction.
Well, this is a fun conversation. And folks, if you’re listening, don’t get turned off by the word chaos. This is what the world has been in. It’s been a hyper-focused chaotic year and all 2020, right? Now, at the start of 2021, we’re still in that same energy and it’s not going away. It’s really going to amplify here forward. And unless you know how to navigate that, it could be a hard road ahead. But it doesn’t have to be. Jothi, talk to me a little bit about why the chaos guru? How or where did that come from?
Sure. As I started looking into how I came to be where I am, and how I’ve managed to go through all my challenges, and not just live through them but actually thrive from them, it really changed my whole mindset. And I’ve been through all kinds of traumas in my life, and all kinds of challenges. From survival to health and wellness traumas, relationship traumas. You name it. I’ve probably gone through it.
I really had to find a way to explain to people, because they were like, “Oh, are you okay? You probably never want to go through that. Right? It was the worst time of your life.” I’m like, “Well, it wasn’t pretty and it didn’t feel good. But actually, I would go through it all over again if I had to.” And I really found it difficult to explain that concept, and I actually didn’t understand it for myself either. Until I really started digging deep and doing a lot of research. Did a lot of programs and training. Took a lot of classes. And I really came to come up with the theory that you know, this is all just chaos.
Everything that happens in life, you’re born out of chaos. If there wasn’t chaos, you wouldn’t even be born right now. Because all babies, when you were born you go through that period of birth, which is a chaotic experience both for the mom and for the child. If we really think about it, you can’t actually live without chaos. Because then there would be no room for innovation, and growth, and really elevating yourself or even changing. Because if you lived in your comfort zone your whole life and really had no reason to do anything different, and there’s nothing sparking any chaos, then you’re just going to be in that same spot for the rest of your life. You’re really not going to thrive in your life.
Yeah. I think that the more that my friends, family, and just others saw how I managed to go through all of these challenges but not just manage. Really come out of it feeling even better than they did before I went through it. I started thinking, “Okay, you know what? I need to help people with this. I need to find a way to merge all of these different areas together.” Because it’s not just one area of your life that the word chaos pertains to. It could be relationships. It could be your wellness, your health. It could be something that happened in your childhood or your career. It could really be a whole different in many different areas that you could be facing this chaos.Â
Let me just affirm for you, folks. What Jothi is talking about here is the fact that the world is full of energy. And while it may not seem chaotic while your life might be in order and everything might seem fine, everything that goes on at work, everything that goes on in your friendships, everything that goes in your family, everything that goes on in your love life, or everything that goes on with money, everything that goes on in social media, politics.
All of that is energy, and we are susceptible to it. And if we don’t maintain control of ourselves, that chaos can run and ruin our lives. And that’s the chaos that Jothi’s speaking to. This is powerful stuff. Pay attention, because what comes next is how you manipulate, and how you understand, and how you use that. That’s why we’re talking about the love of chaos. Jothi, talk to me a little bit about where did this concept of loving chaos come from? What does it even mean? What does that even mean?
So, I looked at chaos as kind of like your best friend. Because if you had a true best friend that really cares about you, they’re not always going to sugar coat things. They’re going to tell you how it is to your face. You might not like it, but you know it’s the truth. That’s kind of what chaos is bringing up. That energy that you talked about. When this chaotic energy comes up, it’s for a reason. It’s there to actually help you grow. So, when something happens in any of these areas in our lives, a lot of us think even for the longest time thought, “Oh, why is this happening to me? I wish it would just go away,” or try to ignore it or avoid it. That usually never ends up working out.
But if we actually choose to love it. “Okay, this is happening for us. It’s for a reason.” Treat like our best friend, and really ask ourselves questions on how we can learn from that. What is it that I am not seeing here? What is it that I need to learn from this situation, whatever that situation might be? And I’m not saying it’s your fault that it’s happening, but you attracted that situation to you for a reason. There’s a part of you that needs to be resolved or healed or something that you need to learn so you can then help others.
I was given six weeks to live after my third baby was born is really when I really got into this stuff, because I really felt like, “Okay, why is this happening to me?” And it wasn’t for any good reason. It was because the OB just made a whole bunch of mistakes, and she either fell asleep at the job or she wasn’t in the right frame of mind. But I actually healed myself naturally over the course of three years when the surgeons had told me that I needed a whole bunch of surgeries, which I chose not to get.
I really started to just fall in love with the concept of: “Okay, there’s chaos happening right now.” And I actually came up with different types of chaos. Because not all chaos is good, so don’t get me wrong on that. I’m not saying that everything that happens to you is really good for you. But there are certain types of chaos I came up with just to keep it simple. The good, the bad, and the ugly.
There you go.
It’s easy to remember. The ugly chaos is kind of like tsunami chaos. These are the things that you’ve been pushing aside. Traumas, or maybe unresolved feelings, or emotions that you just kept pushing, pushing, pushing, pushing all the way inside. And somebody comes along, and sparks that trigger those feelings or those emotions, and then you come roaring across like a tsunami.
That is a type of chaos. You could actually really work on identifying, “Oh, this is what’s happening.” It’s not that what that person said was really wrong, but it triggered something within me. And what is it that it triggered? There might be some unresolved feelings there, or some insecurities, or some vulnerabilities. And there are lots of different techniques and methods that I teach that you can start to release. First of all, resolve, and process those, and then release them from your system, so you can start to minimize the ugly chaos.
Let’s take a quick pause right there, Jothi. I want to go down on the backside of this conversation and explore the other two types of chaos that you’ve identified. Because, folks, at some level you love the chaos that she’s talking about. At some level. And unless you come into an understanding of what’s going on, why that chaos exists, you’ll never know. And we’ll explore it from a place and I love that fact that you said this, Jothi. You started examining: why is this happening to me? And on the flip side of that, really what’s underneath that question, folks, is: why is this happening for you? And that’s where the magic comes. We’re going to dive into the other two areas of chaos here in just a second. Jothi, where can people go find more information about you?
Sure. On my website, jothidugar.com.
Fantastic. Folks, stay tuned. We’re getting ready to go down the rabbit hole on this conversation to explore what it means to love chaos. Stay tuned. We’ll be right back.
To listen to the entire show click on the player above or go to the SuperPower Up! podcast on iTunes.
Podcast: Play in new window
