Jeff Nemeth joins Tonya Dawn Recla to talk about how to build confidence and harness it as a superpower. And channels his inner Donald Duck… Jeff works with people to challenge the bounds of what’s possible with their bodies in order to reframe how they approach life. Listen in as he shares his secrets for getting through obstacles and taking charge of your existence.
Hello, everybody! This is Tonya Dawn Recla, your Super Power Expert. And I’m really really really excited to have on the show today, Jeff Nemeth. I’m not going to let him talk for a second because I really want to brag about this guy. So you know how you know as you go along this evolutionary journey and you accomplish some things in your life and you get to know yourself better what not and you just really want to find those people who are willing to play and they’re willing to be courageous and kind of jump in and be like yeah I don’t know what it’s going to look like. Let’s just try it. And so to me, Jeff is the absolute embodiment of that and he’s on the show today to help us talk about how to build confidence because I think that’s such a crucial topic. I just got done responding to somebody in a Facebook group about this wanting to know you know if you have clarity and you’re moving forward but then you have this resistance and then how do you get past that resistance and what she was really talking about was the idea that it’s one thing to know what you’re going to do next and it’s quite another to actually take the steps to embody it. And the response that came through for her was around discipline, and really having the discipline to make those things happen. Well in order to invoke that in your existence, you have to be able to build that confidence. And so, I’m really excited to have Jeff on the show today to talk about that in the areas of health and fitness and performance and human software updates and all this on. You know he’s absolutely our peeps here. So without further ado please join me in welcoming to the show, Jeff Nemeth! Welcome Jeff.
Thank you. That was quite an intro I’m beaming.
Yea yea yea. I think we should all like when we wake up in the morning have somebody like introduce us to the day that’s not us, and that it’s like wow there we are! We’re great.
Wouldn’t it be cool if it was like a basketball game? And someone called your name in there like lights fireworks and you’re like you know you walk out to get your coffee.
How great would you feel?
Or pro wrestling. You know like our theme music or something. There you go, entrance music. That’s a fan right there.
I’ve been to a few wrestling shows. I’ve been to a few big time wrestling shows in my day. There’s no doubt about it.
Well you’re talking to someone who was a fan back when Dwayne Johnson was Rocky Maivia. So I know a thing or two about wrestling.
I might even have a T-shirt from that era are stashed away.
Yea don’t tell anyone. I actually have figures like figurines that my daughter plays with.
There no shame in that.
But if The Rock happens to want to be listening he’s more than welcome to come on the show.
That would be awesome.
Just wanted to say it. Very cool, welcome. Thank you so much for coming on the show. Big shout out to Brian Keith Noonan for making this connection. Brian’s got some pretty cool friends, so I’m excited to get to meet another one. Thank you.
Yeah. Brian is a great guy. We’ve known each other for a while now and he’s been helpful with a lot of things I’ve done in my business and uh He’s great dude.
Yeah I really am I’m becoming very fond of the whole family, in fact I interviewed Tiffanie first, his wife, and then Neva, our daughter, is interviewing his sons on the Super Power Kids show so, we’re just going to you know have the whole family around us. I think that sounds like a good plan.
Keep on rollin’, yea.
Well very cool. Jeff let’s talk about you though and throw out our first question, what are your Super Powers?
So there’s the question, alright. My superpowers are helping people get really clear on what they want what they desire.
And specifically in the areas of their body their mind and how that relates to what they want to and what they get to be the future. And I’m also really good and really good at developing and delivering a message my own and I help others with that also.
That’s awesome and we were talking a little bit before the show about the kind of our similarities when it came to looking at certain industries and practices, or what we were doing and really being able to revamp those. And what I want the show to focus on today is how to build confidence when you are disrupting things. You know ultimately that’s what we’re doing with the mutation, adaptation, evolution, conversation, is all around disrupting what once was in order to create space for what will be. When you’re working with your clients stuff, what advice do you offer them on how to build confidence as they move forward?
It depends on where they’re struggling. You know we have, there are people that come in with that exceed there are in physical condition that other people look at and go, man if my body just look like that I would feel x y z, you know. And then there are other people that come here that are really strong and others have their life they may have, their career and their family relationships are really good shape but they’re really struggling with their body. So it depends on a lot of people what I tend to see the similarities are with most folks is that when they’re struggling in a certain area, they’re sort of like compartmentalizing everything off and not realizing how intertwined everything is. Especially in today’s world that your relationship ties and your work performance ties into your body, ties into your sleeve, ties into your finances, ties into your happiness. And you know you like I need to fix this area first, and then once I fix this or that I’m going to go to number and then number three. It just doesn’t really work that way. Not anymore it might have at some point that I’m not aware of, but it’s like if you’re going to choose an upgrade you just choose the upgrade and it just goes. And that means that you work with you know, people we work with everything that we can and help fix that upgrade you know. Wherever it starts and wherever we’re going to go with it let’s just intuitively follow it and find out what tools we need to use to get there.
And I love that you’re saying all of this. I call it whack-a-mole. So it’s like you know, it doesn’t really matter what a client dealing with whether it’s relationship, money, body, image, business. Whatever the case may be. You know at the heart of it is the core fear and the fear of limitation, lack disconnection. You know we can talk for hours and days and years probably about what is at the heart of that fear. But ultimately what you’re talking about is so true in the sense that, so let’s say you want to guess one aspect of your life and then and then kind of get that under control. It is, it’s like a whack a mole. See whack that one down and then it pops up in other areas and in other areas. And so if you’re not looking at what is the driving force and managing all of those pieces simultaneously. I think you do find that, that it’s frustrating people don’t see the gains that they’re looking for.
Yeah and you can, the whack-a-mole. Are just great because you can see games in every area of life, but only for a short term if you’re not addressing that underlying root cause. And you know I’ve spoken at length for this before but I can give somebody a 30-day program, or a 60-day program that will knock out of the park their body issues, confidence, or whatever you want to call it. You know they want to lose weight, they want to add muscle whatever it is. If it’s a program that doesn’t work because of their lifestyle, it doesn’t fit in because of where they are mentally or in terms of their schedule. You know, like I don’t write programs, don’t give people things to do that require four hours of food prep when they have kids or three kids at home.
You know that because that’s not it’s not realistic. And that’s something that people struggle with looking at and, if they get that that whack a mole scenario where everything is down just for a little while and it’s like, this is it. This is perfection. This is where it’s going to be that something pops up like, oh what happened? It was all right. I had everything perfect for a second. But you know, it’s a matter of looking across the board and there are, there are things that you can do to improve. There are areas where you don’t like to talk about. You know, being behind or fixing things because it’s really broken. It’s just a matter of improving processes and using different tools. But you know there are things that people kind of have to work on, in certain areas and some more some other areas more than others.
Well, And I also fine tune my own experiences as well as the experiences my clients have is that, if there’s anywhere where people are you know, kind of thinking that if I do this then I will be happier. If I do this then I will be valuable. And so I always caution people especially around money, body, image, relationships, to look at where they are advocating some aspect of their own self-esteem or self-confidence because it will never work. If you think that as long as you have the perfect body, then you will then be happy. Well you’re quickly going to find out is that, that’s not necessarily the case. Now some people I have noticed have to go through the process of checking that box anyway, to figure that out. You know you know I have had success with certain clients, who are able to kind of see prior to checking that box said OK. They get that internal kind of dialogue under control then, they can implement programs that will both change it and they’re ready to step into those spaces confidently. But, and so I do think that there are different ways that people go about it. But have you seen any of that in your own practice?
Yeah. Yeah I do. And you know people come in and in a lot of times when they’re first their first contact with me is I want to lose weight. I wanna get into shape. And so that’s great. That’s kind of for me the sort of the entry way into helping them achieve what they need to, and that may be what they want but not exactly what they need. So I’m how to start that conversation and other people in the process of working with them very quickly they opened up and we see there’s other things, that that that they don’t want to deal with and it comes across as they start asking some questions and finding out more, in relation to that goal. I try to dig as deep as possible and find out you know, what really is it. And generally it’s not necessarily the 10 pounds. It’s that feeling that they’re going to have with 10 pounds and then we start to analyze OK, there is what we’re looking for. So what are those feelings? Let’s dig down a little deeper and find out about those and what are you missing and what are those feelings going to replace for you. And then we can start getting places with them. Some other people are very hesitant that they have got a lot of walls built up especially regarding their physical body and so, I, you know sense that with them and it’s kind of a soft ground. It’s nice too to speak for with some people on how to approach that. You have to sort of build trust in or establish a grounding sort of sort of common ground with them before they’re going to let you kind of have to step sort of lightly on that area.
And that’s one of the reasons why I’m so excited to talk with you. And where the conversation around how to build confidence came up because, for you to say that; Right? So for you to kind of come on the show and be like oh yea know how deep it is how people get these bodies and they say well and there’s these underlying elements like emotions and like self-esteem. And like you know where are you hiding from whatever traumas or whatever you perceive any existence, that’s different. So how was it that you were willing to kind of look at your own business and what you do in the world and say, you know I am saying that my success rate isn’t quite what I want it to be with clients because I’m using a model that maybe, isn’t the most efficient effective any more. What was it that led you to have the courage to do things differently?
I was at a point in my business where I was just sort of very dissatisfied and sort of frustrated and I thought it was just sort of career burnout that I’d been doing this for pushing 15 years now. And I just thought I was burned out in long hours. I was just going over it. I was looking to make a change. And then as I really started to get into it you know what, what is it do I still like about the business and every job I’ve ever had. I’ve always worked for people in one form or another whether it is the restaurant business and marketing, wherever it was always working with people. And that was so I kind of started to think well maybe it’s more than that. And then I realized that I kind of wasn’t serving these clients to the best of my ability, and intuitively I felt like I had more to offer. And so I sort of was subconsciously angry with myself for short changing people that came in and then I thought, OK, well I’m going to have to step up a little more and figure this out. And then, I had a couple of clients that gave me testimonials and they talked about how I help them rebuild themselves, and I helped them learn to appreciate themselves above themselves. This is something that I was doing subconsciously. It wasn’t something that consciously I had done. They sat there and thought I’m going to create this program for this guy’s self-esteem that was just something that we had done in conversations and they didn’t really know what’s happening. So then when I got these testimonials I thought that, OK, I need to. This is all happening at once. There’s a reason this is happening at once. I need to look more at this kind of embrace this. And at the same time I was looking at the people that I had success with that last long term and those that didn’t. And the ones that didn’t either didn’t have the support structure in place so the main you know, the four or five main elements of life around them that were supporting them. We didn’t build that form or we didn’t help them build that. And then the people that did we help build that, or they already had that in place you know someone came in and they had a great home life. They had a great job. They were very fulfilled in all these areas. They were in tune with who they were as an individual. They were just they just needed some help and accountability. We got them they got them on their way. You know that was simple. We were there to fix one piece. Other people we really helped them fix the other ones kind of by accident. But, once we got there then they were on their way and there was a lasting change. So then it just became like OK, there’s something more here that I’m missing that’s what I need to do. Let’s talk about these things that we know are happening, and let’s just own up to the fact that sometimes people are overweight and out of shape because they’re struggling emotionally. They’re not feeling well. They’re using food or alcohol or whatever is coping mechanism. We all know this. But people in my position in the fitness business really don’t talk about it because we feel like we’re not qualified, or we’re afraid to, or that’s the job of a doctor, or a psychiatrist or whatever. And I think that that’s a cop out on many levels because there are some of us that may not have the degree or the proper certification to sit in a clinical setting, but we can certainly help people talk through their issues. And because of the nature of the business that someone is sweating on a floor at 6 AM in front of you. They’re going to be pretty open personally at that point. And maybe that we are there for a reason and we’re there not to be a clinical psychologist, but we’re there to be a coach and a motivator and a friend in a way that that maybe we’re shying away from we should.
Oh awesome! Love everything that you’re saying there we’re going to take a short break here for a second. From a word from our sponsor and then we’ll be right back with us.