How do you manage your emotions when words hurt you? In this episode of Reclamation, the Reclas: Tonya, Justin, and Neva have a meaningful conversation about the power of words and the impact it brings to the people we talk to. The Recla also talks about observing the words that come out of our mouths and deconstructing those words so we can stand a much better chance of growing together instead of growing apart. Join Tonya, Justin, and Neva in today’s episode as they talk more about the power of what we say and what happens when words hurt. 

Hello everyone. And welcome back to Reclamation. We’re so glad that you’ve joined us again today. We are talking today about when words hurt, this is such a powerful conversation right now. So present in so many homes that it feels incredibly important to talk about how we manage these things. Right. In the first episode, you got to hear Justin kind of do a little slip of the tongue there with some words and we respond to that. And part of the reason for that is because when we don’t look at what we’re saying, then we’re not really clear what we’re thinking. And if we’re not clear what we’re thinking, do not know what we believe. All of that is what dictates our reality. And so when we’re talking about the dynamics of relationships and families and with other people, it’s super important that we’re willing to observe, right?

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Observe the words that we’re saying because they give us indications of what’s really on our hearts and what subconscious programs we may have that are having us act in a way that delivers something back to us from the projection that we’re not entirely sure we want to experience. And in deconstructing that together and our relationships, we stand a much better chance of growing together instead of growing apart. And so today’s episode is all around how we navigate this space because if you’ve listened to us for more than a second, you’re very clear at this point in time that we eat, breathe, and sleep, everything developmental, right? Everything, self-dominion, everything walking in communion with the divine. And so that’s how we approach these things. My question right now, and I’ll ask Neva first, is in, in your experience, the younger generations we’ve seen are by far more tolerant in terms of allowing the world to kind of reshape in front of their faces. But there’s so much of the history of things, of the depth of things, the foundation of things that you just can’t possibly have a construct for. How do you navigate gleaning the information you need to have when you’re pretty sure you might be more aware or know more maybe than even some adults in a situation, how do you walk that path?

That’s a great question. My answer would go with patience because from a young age, you taught me to respect adults. That’s it, period. You respected adults, even if what they’re saying goes completely against what you believe or what your opinion is, or what you know. And so the biggest thing I would say, and from my own personal experience, in some uncomfortable situations with adults, where I would say don’t necessarily carry the same viewpoint as me on the world is patience and love first, even when it seems hard. And even when they’re not giving you that same respect back. And I do that in a lot of areas. I’m in areas where, to my face, I’m being taught to believe this thing when all life I’ve been taught to believe the other. And so meeting people with love and respect first, and we were talking about this with someone saying, it’s okay to assume someone’s gender.

It’s okay to assume something about them and me commenting on the fact that, well, that’s not okay if it turns into a judgment. And that turns into a fear-based mindset that you’re now judging this person for who you think they are. And it was an adult saying that to me and I had to sit with myself. Am I really going to sit and argue about this, or am I just going to admit that that’s okay, they can believe that? And I’m going to continue believing this. And I’m going to meet them with love and respect.

Well I’d imagine that answer is different depending on circumstances, right?

Yes, of course. And like we learned, my biggest thing is not assuming anything about someone before you get to know them. That’s like something I talk about a lot is I don’t assume someone’s gender. I don’t assume anything about someone before I ask them and get to know who they are. And I realized a lot of people don’t do that, but I also realize that if I’m judging people for judging people that I’m doing the same thing, I’m blaming them for. So I like to gain that patience. And we were also talking about, get so clear on what you believe within yourself and not even about an opinion where to you, it’s a fact that what anybody else says, can’t shake that. Even if it’s someone you respect.

Yeah. Excuse me. I love how you phrase that. And then, and it’s really important that we look at the circumstances, right? Just you want to chime in here before a jump to break.

Yeah. I love the fact that you’re able to frame that up and Neva, you frame that up so beautifully. I mean, that’s really what I see. One of the biggest problems in our society today is that everybody’s, there’s so much divisiveness, right? And there’s no acceptance of what another perspective might be, but we automatically jump to making the other person wrong. Right. And that happens in families, right? What happens between parents and children and adult kids and their parents. It happens at school. It’s all over social media, right? It’s all over the news. And that’s what’s been taught as acceptable. That just because somebody else has a different viewpoint than you, that they’re wrong. And I love the fact that you brought it back Neeva, to love first.

Love harder.

Because if we’re going to get it. Exactly, love harder, if we’re going to get anything done or we’re going to have any type of forwarding movement, moving the needle, as far as social consciousness goes, we have to start meeting each other in the middle.

We have to meet each other in love first. And I love the fact that we’re talking about words hurt because calling names, identifying somebody, assuming like you said, assuming something about somebody else or judging them or calling them a name because they believe something a certain way is ultimately detrimental to the health of the family and health of the relationships we have, the health of our society. And it’s completely unnecessary because it only leads to one thing and that’s more fear. Not willing to evolve and further separation from God is essentially what it comes down to.

Well and we’re going to jump to break folks talking about when words hurt, but right before we do, what Justin just said is super powerful, because it really speaks to the purpose of the network. Part of the guidance and developing this podcast network was to bring everyone into the same conversation. And it’s important that we learn to dialogue together. So we’ll talk more after the break about how you can do that, how you can kind of introduce these concepts into your family, into your workplaces, into your homes, and everywhere that you are, how you can shine that light a little bit brighter and encourage others to meet each other in love. For right now, go to superpowerexperts.com to find out how to get on the path, to unlock your superpowers. Step one is listening to an episode each day from the network that attunes you to how to have these conversations, how to come from love, how to talk about the hard stuff when we really don’t want to and everything says runaway, right?

That’s what you’re going to get from the network. You’re going to prepare yourself to move into spaces you don’t even know exist yet. Right? And when you’ve camped out there for a little while and you feel relatively confident that you’re ready to move on to the next step, then go into step two and join the IM series. You can put your email in at step two and you’ll get those videos. They are weekly videos to your inbox each week. That’s our gift to you. And those of you have been camping out. Now, I am serious. Let’s move on to the programs, right? Go start looking at the programs page and start praying, meditating, sitting in nature. Ask about your journey with that. And if it’s in resonance, be sure to reach out to us for now, though, we are talking about when words hurt and we’ll be right back after this break.

To listen to the entire show click on the player above or go to the SuperPower Up! podcast on iTunes.